Check your Switch games.

You walk over to your shelves and check out your collection of games. You don't play your Switch too often, but on the chance that you do, you typically play a Mario or Kirby game.

Pretty much any game you play has a red element to it, but there are some exceptions. The super hero games, and Darksiders 2, are really just there for you to "goon" at, of course. Your words, not mine. The fact that the devs gave the main characters these massive bulges but aren't allowed to commit to full explicit content bothers you to no end. You've written quite a lot of slander reviews about these games you do genuinely enjoy, but leaves you blue balled after playing for a bit.

You sigh audibly. At least Mario won't ever disappoint you...

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